Starting a blog... again...

Hola!

I've been thinking and praying and I feel like my head may burst with anxiety when I push "publish!" But I'm trying to be brave and vulnerable and I'm going to go with my gut this time! So I am starting this blog again, not like I used to do it, although I love reading my old entries, but instead writing about the "things" I love: projects I'm working on, home decor, and some great "before and afters!" Who doesn't love a good "before and after?"  I literally haven't blogged for years! My life has been pretty chaotic between my cute kids, crazy health,  and my past business endeavors,  I just haven't felt the desire to post or even read blogs for that matter! Although now I'm seriously regretting not writing down all the memories we made the past few years (good and bad)! It's amazing how fast time goes by and my heart aches when I realize how much my kids have grown since my last post! But I can't change that- but I can try and do better! Right?!

So here I go. Taking the leap and letting you into my personal life and home. After lots of encouragement from this handsome man and some great friends I think it is the right time for me to start something new here! (Deep breath!)

Anyway, I was married young (18!), I was naive and had so much growing up to do! We spent the first 5 years just the two of us, we bought a old broken home and put as much time, sweat, tears, and money into it as we could.  We loved that little home. It was tiny and old and perfect for the two of us. We learned a lot about each other and how strong we were when we had no other choice. We made big hard decisions and faced huge devistating loses. We ended up getting a offer to sale and sold that sweet home. But then we were homeless and had to quickly find a home! We also started the adoption process and in only a few months we found out we would be new parents.... actually the day we closed on the new home was the day our son was born! Life quickly changed, we had a new baby, a new home, a new neighborhood! With the newness of motherhood and bills to pay and stress to manage, someplace along the way I lost myself trying to survive! Motherhood has always been my greatest joy, but I'll be completely honest, it is really hard! The days of surviving can be long and exhausting, even though they are so rewarding and wonderful.  Most days it became a matter of just choosing which battle I was willing to fight and which one I was ok to loose! Anyone else?

Time kept moving and whether I liked it or not, things kept changing! We were surprised to learn that we were able to get pregnant on our own when our first child was only 15 months old! Then again 3 years later! With 3 kids under 5, I found myself completely overwhelmed! Those years I blogged about everything! I blogged about my hair, my kids, their activities, our families, anything really to just get my posts in everyday! I wanted to remember those days even though they were messy! Then after 10 years in that home on a culdesac we decided it was time to build "THE" home and make some changes again. We needed some space and room to breathe! That home built me, it was where I grew up, we brought home our babies, we made life long friendships, and discovered where we wanted to be forever. We bought 6 acres of untouched farmland about a half mile away (literally just down the road) and built "THE" home we dreamed of in the very middle of the property.

It's a simple, small white house in the county, (I would like to also state that we did this all white house before they were a "thing" and so many people thought we were crazy!) But it's ours and we are a little crazy. We planned every wall and every corner, every room and every closet. And again we moved in the week our 4th child was born! (I like to do things at the worst possible time apparently!!) And here we are 3 years later with 4 kids, a miniature pony, a cute dog, and finally feeling settled and ready to do this!

Don't get me wrong, I'm still developing and learning and grasping whatever I can about motherhood  and making this house a home. Everyday is different and thinking of the possibilities is all very exciting! But most importantly I just love pretty things! I don't know if there are rules because I don't really follow them, mosts of the time I'm totally winging it!!( Life, my eyeliner, parenting, all of it!)  This blog will be about all that, the whole process.  The direction and purpose of this will be a lot different than it used to be! I'm focusing more on things that make me excited- like Target, home decor, DIY,  Diet Coke, and pretty things- mixed with lots of family and the personal shiz that happens in our everyday life.

My main goal is to be as real and honest as possible. I want to show the process and not just the final result! I hope that along the way I'll continue to find that person that I lost when I was younger and maybe develop into the person that I feel I'm meant to be! Sounds so cliche right? ( Insert eyeroll here)

I'd love to have you join me- but more importantly I want to hear what you have to say! Leave me a comment, (not for ratings or likes or any of that stuff... I have no idea how that works!) but because I want to know you are here and what you have to say! I'd love your advice or encouragement or maybe just to know that I'm not alone in this!

There you go, I'm Annalee, a small town girl from Idaho who really likes to be at home... hence IdaHOMEgirl. I'm really a open book and this blog is just the beginning!